Cool, over qualified. I wonder what the qualification requirement for a girlfriend is these days. Except with engineers: I know that for them it's either nurse or preschool teacher.
it's not something directly about me, although i've gotten some similar comments. it's actually from a friend's blog post i just read. she also has a masters degree (in accounting, mine is in computer science) and fiercely independent like me. and it seems she's having trouble with guys accepting these qualities in her.
@cybette: You're not too independent and overqualified. You're independent and qualified (which is totally a good thing). Some guys can handle it, some can't. You, yourself, decide if you need a guy in your life or not :)
@cybette: I know a lot of independent young men, who are pursuing a career and they either go for a girlfriend, who would sacrifice their own career and take more charge of the household or for another independent professional to share their life with.
@tulensrma: A lot of engineer boys would take an engineer girl, but there ain't enough of 'em for everybody. I've been watching the University of Helsinki computer sciences boys getting aggressive and desperate in last weeks over the few single freshmen girls they got.
@cybette: I heard from one man last summer that I'm "otherwise a perfect girl, but sense of humor is just too sarcastic" and that I wouldn't mold to his lifestyle (move where he lives and considering he has a kid from ex-marriage etc.). Had to just laugh out loud. I got a great boyfriend, who is even more sarcastic, yet warm, and who is free to shape the relationship on both of our terms.
also some guys who have "yellow fever" like asian girls for the stereotypical trait of being sweet, demure, good wife/cook/mother etc., all of which i'm not. narrows the playing field for me i suppose. i don't need a guy but i like having that special connection with someone. it's part of being human.
@cybette: Well in Finland your chances for finding a male nurse or preschool teacher should be relatively higher than most other parts in the world (well I believe that in the UK being a male nurse is pretty much appreciated, too).
@cybette I'll give you my point-of-view. A long time ago, a French friend of mine (a guy) & I were talking about women, etc...(this is before I met my girlfriend). He said to me "I prefer women who can shout louder than me". That explains exactly my attitude. I prefer women who like a good argument, who don't just say "whatever you want honey"..
There is nothing wrong with looking for a guy who can "handle" you. And I don't mean that in any insulting way.
Nothing wrong with a woman with a strong independent personality. Alot of guys like it.
A relationship is what you make it and with whom you make it. All the other crap does not matter. Be yourself and hopefully you'll meet someone who will be like minded. If it does not work, just keep it moving, it'll happen.
@cybette well at least you're not a losery, dependent, submissive type. you're awesome. and you need someone awesome alongside with you. don't get me started on my end. bah!
@jkniv I don't know eactly what you mean, but the "average" persons attitude to a guy being a nurse is "oh thats strange".
I don't know many Finnish guys, but the guys I know well seem like they would not let something stupid (in that it doesn't matter how the womans personality is...strong or not) like a strong female stand in the way of liking a woman.
Finnish guys seem to be level headed, maybe too level headed.
@suviko that's great for you! i know there are guys out there who can accept me for who i am. but i'm talking about in general, guys want to be more dominant, expect the girl to make some sacrifices especially in terms of career for theirs, and so on. that's why in general guys go for younger girls, so they can "take care" of them and so on (even Stefan). i'm actually seeing a guy who's 8 years younger, and so far he doesn't seem have problems with who i am, although i wonder what will happen when the novelty wears off. we'll see.
"Over-qualified", is there such a thing?! :) If guys in general find you intimidating, then you have just not spent time with the right crowd of the male gender :)
hmm.. this is really interesting. i think it all comes down to meeting the right people. in the society i live in most men prefer the demure type of woman and most women prefer the dominant type of man. but honestly.. if someone thinks that a woman is "too" independent or "over" qualified or if they find that intimidating - well clearly they aren't the kind of people you'd want to be associating with. if they need someone who they can look down to, in order to validate their own worth, well then the problem is with them and not with or your friend...
@Suviko WOW, what an asshole (the first guy). Man, us guys can really be dickheads at times.
Nothing wrong with saying that your sense of humour is too sarcastic for him (what is he? a softie?), but you can't "mould to his life"? What an asshole.
See what happens when you don't accept some sort of second best...screw him..he should have been the one to "mould" to your life, with his +1.
@cybette "in general, guys want to be more dominant, expect the girl to make some sacrifices" - this goes the other way too. The problem is when one side of it has to make more sacrifices than the other side. I made this mistake once, and I won't be making it again (i didn't make a sacrifice, when i should have).
if the novelty wears off your relationship (why should it!? thats a silly thing to say)...well if the guy can't "handle" you, thats his problem..not yours.
I have a friend, my age, who has been seeing, and now living with a woman, 13-14 years his elder. They are as happy as pigs in....pig-houses :)
@hyprocrisy has banged the nail on the head. maybe you need to mix with other guys...or add other people to your group.
i think my guy friends don't have a problem with me - as a friend. i'm usually that - one of the guys. which is all fine and dandy until i find myself being attracted to one of them but they don't see me as girlfriend material. hmm... maybe i should consider some alternatives. hey @chibbigirl, what do you say, you and i... ;)
Damn you boys. I'm out of the loop. Ok anyways, I guess I should say something about this relationship-forming business (in which I'm admittedly a kind of failure, an outlier-case if you will). In my opinion people tend to discuss a bit too much about the very high semantical aspects of relationships (like his and her learned opinions, memes if you will, clashing) when many problems in finding a suitable mate have just to do with the incompatible temperaments (and Carol knows quite a bit about personality types). Furthermore temperaments are such basic qualities of human nature that they have lot to do with psychological and neurological condition (for instance such a basic thing as a propensity to migraines make person's more edgy/cranky). Indeed the concept of "normalcy" can be considered a gray area, a product of the interactions between a person's genetic make-up and the environment.
What I want to say that I don't 100% believe in the "party line" that is the romantic conception that "there is somebody for each of us out there, just keep looking". Theoretically in the population of 6.7 billion that this Earth carries, there could be a good enough pairing for pretty much each of us, but in practice there are local bottlenecks for that to happen. Also the fact that evolution drives us to find the "best" mate ignoring the good of the whole population, makes for a lot of misery -- I guess that's why people are almost jokingly urged to "hate the game, not the player". :D
There is someone out there for each and every one, but life gives you lemons, making people bitter, and when you're bitter you squint your eyes so you can't quite see them, or are unwilling to take a plunge to meet that person, because you're concentrated on drinking the non-acidic kool-aid that is "settling for"
Chibbi virtual-spanked me! i think i found my match ;) @jkniiv i didn't get the Jaana reference either. and while temperament plays a big part in the interaction between people it is still not the main factor that makes or breaks a relationship. at least in my experience.... there are just too many other factors. i don't believe in having "the one" in my life. i'm just looking for someone who's willing to spend time with me and work towards a rewarding relationship together.
@cybette: About you not being considered girlfriend material thing by at least, I take an exception to that. :) For those of you who don't know, me and Carol have a smallest bit of history between us. I won't go into details but let me say that now I consider her my "BFF" ( how long when she reads this, she is very protective of certain aspects of her private life :/ ). That's mostly because of our similarities in temperament. Yet I don't know what I seek in a potential mate -- should she be like dominating or submissive (to be stereotypical), but one thing I know: she ought not be too "average". Average girls simply bore me, and Carol is far from average. I hail her for that!
Hmm. I don't know Carol at all, yet I claim to have gathered from people's reactions to hear that there's quite a few men out there who would find her interesting - maybe also as a date. I know a bunch of interesting & funny single geek boys and could easily find a blind date for @cybette with her specs. :)
@suviko: Well, she has the wrong kind of girly testosterone for me (those lips!), so yes. I'm torn between the beautiful and a bit boyish Jessica Biel and the frail and intelligent jewess called Natalie Portman. See how I can't make my mind between different female archetypes?
@myrtti: Creepy is my middle name. Asperger Syndrome + anxiety/depression has left its mark in my psyche. When I was younger I was even labeled with borderline personality disorder (no diagnosis of that in records, afaik). Basically I haven't taken a "role" in society. I have qualities that make me less than typical heterosexual male, but then again I'm also only really interested in women. Even the very feminine-looking men just please my eye but that doesn't make me want them. But assertiveness in feminine girls (who in no way have to be classical beauties) I find attractive -- somebody who could kick my ass without bruising it too badly. :P
And @myrtti, based on your profile picture, fugly is not a word in my (SELECT females.exterior_description FROM females WHERE females.nickname = "myrtti" AND females.hobbies LIKE %jaiku%) records. :-)
@Suviko: "a bunch of interesting & funny single geek boys"?? where have they all been hiding? Helsinki? line up a couple of blind dates for me and i'll take the next train down XD
@cybette: In Helsinki & Espoo mainly. If you are serious about it, I just might, if I knew your preferences and somebody would seem like a match. (One of the people I'm thinking of is working for Nokia. And it's not @matnel. :)
Wow, you certainly know how to spark off a debate! I like the way @lemonad and @runningwithbulls put it. Personally, I don't go for passive girls. They need to have a good mind and able to have their own opinions. You've got those things in abundance, which is great. I'm pretty sure there's a softer/insecure part of you too that 'needs' a man, though. You just need to find the right man that fits.
it seems that being in a stable relationship/marriage is an unspoken prerequisite for joining Nokia. (for people above a certain age probably... @constantine and @matnel are too young so they're exempt, lol). not sure how i managed to slip in under the radar ;) @suviko i'll email you later!
@Cybette May I ask which society is that friend from?
I agree that different societies have their expections toward male and female, that may cause what you say "In general, men are blah blah blah", and on the contrary, "women are blah blah blah". But the more I know about my friends' relationships, the more exceptions I see. When there are enough exceptions, it's hard to say "in general, blah blah blah."
I think it is good that "I am too independant and over qualified, that puts off some guys", because dealing with many Mr. Notright is exhausting, time should be used effectively. It is not logical to think that, because you put off some guys, so you don't need guys. They are not relevant. When a man says this to me, I would think it actually means: "I am too independant and over qualified (to him), that puts him away." Hence the question for me are, "Do I want him? Am I willI to become dependant and give up my job/title/whatever in order to keep him with me?" If the answer is no, then I don't need him.
I think your friend maybe frustrated by her experience with guys. Just want to let her (and/or you) know, it's not her fault, don't feel guilty, she is not the one who should be blamed.
As for male nurse and preschool teacher. I have met few male freinds in the church that are accepting nursing training. Besides, the bass player of Ensiferum whose another job is a #more-422">preschool teacher.:)
@whiteg: it's Gloria, so a Taiwanese girl in an American society. anyway, will reply more later. rushing off to police station now. oh and a rocker who's a preschool teacher? haawwwwt...
@Suviko: while you are matching @cybette up with someone, mind finding me someone too? seems that Tampere area is somewhat lacking in the prospective geeky/smart boyfriend thing.
@whiteg: M$ enthusiasts need not apply... (yes, I'm picky, but in my previous long time relationship things got worse after the other turned into MS fanboi from Linux geekdom and we had a week long battle over which OS would be best on home multipurpose server, W2003 or Debian...)
@myrtti No, he is actually now a Linux applicaion developer, he uses Ubuntu (sadly not Debian). Err this reminds me that I tend to argue with bf which Linux distribution is better for use, Redhat or Debian. (I still insist Freebsd is the best.:P)
@myrtti, I think you should join us in a couple of weeks when I'm in Tampere. From a quick look at your Flickr photos, there may be some conflict - http://tinyurl.com/3zca8u
innuendo assumes i'm trying to hide my perverted thoughts and leave it to your imagination to fill the gaps; i like just getting to the point. that's me. stefan.
Good lukks be wid ya. Considering current intrpersonal claimat, mefinkz me will not com dis taim to meetku. Tings can chaynj, sou me taiz not me hands 100% in advanss.
@matnel: I did actually win the first round of that fight. Then he wanted to make a multimedia server out of it, and the tv card had drivers for Windows only. Then I lost.
Was MythTV not able to cope? I use OSX for my TV. Dunno about using Debian though, I've always been more of a Gentoo person, like the cleanliness of it.
it had some flaky el cheapo fake raid sata card too that had the "correct drivers" for Windows but not for Linux other than SLES and RHEL. I abhore rpm-based Linuxes.
@cybette: what I was akshully thinking was that we definitely need to go out for a cuppa triple espresso and talk! you seem to be an intresting (and also quite similar to myself) person.
@myrtti totta kai! let's plan on that. tomorrow i have to help a friend with a programming assignment, not sure how long that'll take, so maybe sometime during the week? one thing though, most of my linux experience have been rpm-based distributions :P heheh..
@myrtti: on saturday i'll be in Helsinki for the Barcamp and on sunday i think we will have a Tampereen päivä meetku. We're also meeting Duncan on Tuesday evening. haven't confirmed time/place etc. but please feel free to suggest something!
101 comments so far
Depends on the guy. I think you need Stefan.
1 year, 2 months ago by dst
I.. what???!
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
ROFL!
1 year, 2 months ago by afr
overqualified for what!?
1 year, 2 months ago by Bishop
is this something someone said about you?
1 year, 2 months ago by nanci
Cool, over qualified. I wonder what the qualification requirement for a girlfriend is these days. Except with engineers: I know that for them it's either nurse or preschool teacher.
1 year, 2 months ago by tulensrma
Not emotionally unstable is one of my requirements :)
1 year, 2 months ago by edythemighty
it's not something directly about me, although i've gotten some similar comments. it's actually from a friend's blog post i just read. she also has a masters degree (in accounting, mine is in computer science) and fiercely independent like me. and it seems she's having trouble with guys accepting these qualities in her.
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@cybette: You're not too independent and overqualified. You're independent and qualified (which is totally a good thing). Some guys can handle it, some can't. You, yourself, decide if you need a guy in your life or not :)
1 year, 2 months ago by lemonad
@tulensrma hmm, where do i find a male nurse or preschool teacher? ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@cybette Movies.
1 year, 2 months ago by edythemighty
Male nurse? Bah!
1 year, 2 months ago by BigEclipse
@lemonad said it well. If the guy has a problem with you being independent and "qualified" then you're with the wrong guy.
My brother-in-law is a kindergarten teacher but he's spoken for. :) There might be others like him.
1 year, 2 months ago by tulensrma
@cybette: I know a lot of independent young men, who are pursuing a career and they either go for a girlfriend, who would sacrifice their own career and take more charge of the household or for another independent professional to share their life with.
@tulensrma: A lot of engineer boys would take an engineer girl, but there ain't enough of 'em for everybody. I've been watching the University of Helsinki computer sciences boys getting aggressive and desperate in last weeks over the few single freshmen girls they got.
@cybette: I heard from one man last summer that I'm "otherwise a perfect girl, but sense of humor is just too sarcastic" and that I wouldn't mold to his lifestyle (move where he lives and considering he has a kid from ex-marriage etc.). Had to just laugh out loud. I got a great boyfriend, who is even more sarcastic, yet warm, and who is free to shape the relationship on both of our terms.
1 year, 2 months ago by Suviko
also some guys who have "yellow fever" like asian girls for the stereotypical trait of being sweet, demure, good wife/cook/mother etc., all of which i'm not. narrows the playing field for me i suppose. i don't need a guy but i like having that special connection with someone. it's part of being human.
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@cybette: Well in Finland your chances for finding a male nurse or preschool teacher should be relatively higher than most other parts in the world (well I believe that in the UK being a male nurse is pretty much appreciated, too).
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@cybette I'll give you my point-of-view. A long time ago, a French friend of mine (a guy) & I were talking about women, etc...(this is before I met my girlfriend). He said to me "I prefer women who can shout louder than me". That explains exactly my attitude. I prefer women who like a good argument, who don't just say "whatever you want honey"..
There is nothing wrong with looking for a guy who can "handle" you. And I don't mean that in any insulting way.
Nothing wrong with a woman with a strong independent personality. Alot of guys like it.
Tell your friend that.
1 year, 2 months ago by runningwithbulls
A relationship is what you make it and with whom you make it. All the other crap does not matter. Be yourself and hopefully you'll meet someone who will be like minded. If it does not work, just keep it moving, it'll happen.
1 year, 2 months ago by BigEclipse
@cybette well at least you're not a losery, dependent, submissive type. you're awesome. and you need someone awesome alongside with you. don't get me started on my end. bah!
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
@jkniv I don't know eactly what you mean, but the "average" persons attitude to a guy being a nurse is "oh thats strange".
I don't know many Finnish guys, but the guys I know well seem like they would not let something stupid (in that it doesn't matter how the womans personality is...strong or not) like a strong female stand in the way of liking a woman.
Finnish guys seem to be level headed, maybe too level headed.
Apologies if I offend anyone - not my intention
1 year, 2 months ago by runningwithbulls
@suviko that's great for you! i know there are guys out there who can accept me for who i am. but i'm talking about in general, guys want to be more dominant, expect the girl to make some sacrifices especially in terms of career for theirs, and so on. that's why in general guys go for younger girls, so they can "take care" of them and so on (even Stefan). i'm actually seeing a guy who's 8 years younger, and so far he doesn't seem have problems with who i am, although i wonder what will happen when the novelty wears off. we'll see.
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
Lets turn it upside down, shall we?
I'm so independent and picky that most of the men don't qualify for me.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
"Over-qualified", is there such a thing?! :) If guys in general find you intimidating, then you have just not spent time with the right crowd of the male gender :)
1 year, 2 months ago by hypocrisy
hmm.. this is really interesting. i think it all comes down to meeting the right people. in the society i live in most men prefer the demure type of woman and most women prefer the dominant type of man. but honestly.. if someone thinks that a woman is "too" independent or "over" qualified or if they find that intimidating - well clearly they aren't the kind of people you'd want to be associating with. if they need someone who they can look down to, in order to validate their own worth, well then the problem is with them and not with or your friend...
1 year, 2 months ago by nanci
@Suviko WOW, what an asshole (the first guy). Man, us guys can really be dickheads at times.
Nothing wrong with saying that your sense of humour is too sarcastic for him (what is he? a softie?), but you can't "mould to his life"? What an asshole.
See what happens when you don't accept some sort of second best...screw him..he should have been the one to "mould" to your life, with his +1.
@cybette "in general, guys want to be more dominant, expect the girl to make some sacrifices" - this goes the other way too. The problem is when one side of it has to make more sacrifices than the other side. I made this mistake once, and I won't be making it again (i didn't make a sacrifice, when i should have).
if the novelty wears off your relationship (why should it!? thats a silly thing to say)...well if the guy can't "handle" you, thats his problem..not yours.
I have a friend, my age, who has been seeing, and now living with a woman, 13-14 years his elder. They are as happy as pigs in....pig-houses :)
@hyprocrisy has banged the nail on the head. maybe you need to mix with other guys...or add other people to your group.
1 year, 2 months ago by runningwithbulls
@dst: I think Jaana is done with Stefan, so he's free.
1 year, 2 months ago by hlehto
@hlehto: Jaana somebody in Jaiku? Color me intrigued. :)
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@hlehto, I just got that :)
1 year, 2 months ago by tulensrma
i think my guy friends don't have a problem with me - as a friend. i'm usually that - one of the guys. which is all fine and dandy until i find myself being attracted to one of them but they don't see me as girlfriend material. hmm... maybe i should consider some alternatives. hey @chibbigirl, what do you say, you and i... ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
Damn you boys. I'm out of the loop. Ok anyways, I guess I should say something about this relationship-forming business (in which I'm admittedly a kind of failure, an outlier-case if you will). In my opinion people tend to discuss a bit too much about the very high semantical aspects of relationships (like his and her learned opinions, memes if you will, clashing) when many problems in finding a suitable mate have just to do with the incompatible temperaments (and Carol knows quite a bit about personality types). Furthermore temperaments are such basic qualities of human nature that they have lot to do with psychological and neurological condition (for instance such a basic thing as a propensity to migraines make person's more edgy/cranky). Indeed the concept of "normalcy" can be considered a gray area, a product of the interactions between a person's genetic make-up and the environment.
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@cybette count me in! ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
What I want to say that I don't 100% believe in the "party line" that is the romantic conception that "there is somebody for each of us out there, just keep looking". Theoretically in the population of 6.7 billion that this Earth carries, there could be a good enough pairing for pretty much each of us, but in practice there are local bottlenecks for that to happen. Also the fact that evolution drives us to find the "best" mate ignoring the good of the whole population, makes for a lot of misery -- I guess that's why people are almost jokingly urged to "hate the game, not the player". :D
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
There is someone out there for each and every one, but life gives you lemons, making people bitter, and when you're bitter you squint your eyes so you can't quite see them, or are unwilling to take a plunge to meet that person, because you're concentrated on drinking the non-acidic kool-aid that is "settling for"
1 year, 2 months ago by edythemighty
@jkniiv i know what you're talking about
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
Chibbi virtual-spanked me! i think i found my match ;) @jkniiv i didn't get the Jaana reference either. and while temperament plays a big part in the interaction between people it is still not the main factor that makes or breaks a relationship. at least in my experience.... there are just too many other factors. i don't believe in having "the one" in my life. i'm just looking for someone who's willing to spend time with me and work towards a rewarding relationship together.
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@cybette: About you not being considered girlfriend material thing by at least, I take an exception to that. :) For those of you who don't know, me and Carol have a smallest bit of history between us. I won't go into details but let me say that now I consider her my "BFF" ( how long when she reads this, she is very protective of certain aspects of her private life :/ ). That's mostly because of our similarities in temperament. Yet I don't know what I seek in a potential mate -- should she be like dominating or submissive (to be stereotypical), but one thing I know: she ought not be too "average". Average girls simply bore me, and Carol is far from average. I hail her for that!
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
Kudos to non-average Carol! :P
1 year, 2 months ago by Bishop
Corr: "by at least your friends, I take ..."
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@bishop: Hear hear! :)
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
Hmm. I don't know Carol at all, yet I claim to have gathered from people's reactions to hear that there's quite a few men out there who would find her interesting - maybe also as a date. I know a bunch of interesting & funny single geek boys and could easily find a blind date for @cybette with her specs. :)
1 year, 2 months ago by Suviko
Carol, i am glad you liked the spanking!
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
@chibbigirl: Woohoo, girl-on-girl spankage. Do make a habit of it from time to time. ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
Are we back to @chibbi kissed a girl?
1 year, 2 months ago by mobiledan
Sometimes nothing else will do the job
1 year, 2 months ago by edythemighty
@suviko: But what about cute geek girls? :) One built like Angelina Jolie for Carol, and a bit more feminine one for me, if you please! :P
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@mobiledan: Chibbi the one hit wonder? ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@jkniiv: More feminine than Angelina Jolie?
parse error
1 year, 2 months ago by Suviko
@suviko: Well, she has the wrong kind of girly testosterone for me (those lips!), so yes. I'm torn between the beautiful and a bit boyish Jessica Biel and the frail and intelligent jewess called Natalie Portman. See how I can't make my mind between different female archetypes?
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
I like lesbian/bisexual femmes, too, if that clarifies. :P
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@jkniiv: you're starting to sound so creepy I'm glad I'm the female computer geek archetype of overweight and fugly kind.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
@myrtti: Creepy is my middle name. Asperger Syndrome + anxiety/depression has left its mark in my psyche. When I was younger I was even labeled with borderline personality disorder (no diagnosis of that in records, afaik). Basically I haven't taken a "role" in society. I have qualities that make me less than typical heterosexual male, but then again I'm also only really interested in women. Even the very feminine-looking men just please my eye but that doesn't make me want them. But assertiveness in feminine girls (who in no way have to be classical beauties) I find attractive -- somebody who could kick my ass without bruising it too badly. :P
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
And @myrtti, based on your profile picture, fugly is not a word in my (SELECT females.exterior_description FROM females WHERE females.nickname = "myrtti" AND females.hobbies LIKE %jaiku%) records. :-)
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@Suviko: "a bunch of interesting & funny single geek boys"?? where have they all been hiding? Helsinki? line up a couple of blind dates for me and i'll take the next train down XD
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@cybette: In Helsinki & Espoo mainly. If you are serious about it, I just might, if I knew your preferences and somebody would seem like a match. (One of the people I'm thinking of is working for Nokia. And it's not @matnel. :)
1 year, 2 months ago by Suviko
i need to read this thread when i come back to my hotel, if not then when i return to helsinki.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
i thought everyone at nokia is either married or has a girlfriend, at least that's how it seems. i'm the only guy i know at nokia house who is single.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
@constantine: I thought you know @matnel? :)
1 year, 2 months ago by Suviko
oh durrr, yea, that's one. who else lol.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
Wow, you certainly know how to spark off a debate! I like the way @lemonad and @runningwithbulls put it. Personally, I don't go for passive girls. They need to have a good mind and able to have their own opinions. You've got those things in abundance, which is great. I'm pretty sure there's a softer/insecure part of you too that 'needs' a man, though. You just need to find the right man that fits.
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
it seems that being in a stable relationship/marriage is an unspoken prerequisite for joining Nokia. (for people above a certain age probably... @constantine and @matnel are too young so they're exempt, lol). not sure how i managed to slip in under the radar ;) @suviko i'll email you later!
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
i'm not full time so i don't count, neither is matti
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
@Cybette May I ask which society is that friend from?
I agree that different societies have their expections toward male and female, that may cause what you say "In general, men are blah blah blah", and on the contrary, "women are blah blah blah". But the more I know about my friends' relationships, the more exceptions I see. When there are enough exceptions, it's hard to say "in general, blah blah blah."
I think it is good that "I am too independant and over qualified, that puts off some guys", because dealing with many Mr. Notright is exhausting, time should be used effectively. It is not logical to think that, because you put off some guys, so you don't need guys. They are not relevant. When a man says this to me, I would think it actually means: "I am too independant and over qualified (to him), that puts him away." Hence the question for me are, "Do I want him? Am I willI to become dependant and give up my job/title/whatever in order to keep him with me?" If the answer is no, then I don't need him.
I think your friend maybe frustrated by her experience with guys. Just want to let her (and/or you) know, it's not her fault, don't feel guilty, she is not the one who should be blamed.
1 year, 2 months ago by whiteg
As for male nurse and preschool teacher. I have met few male freinds in the church that are accepting nursing training. Besides, the bass player of Ensiferum whose another job is a #more-422">preschool teacher.:)
1 year, 2 months ago by whiteg
@whiteg: it's Gloria, so a Taiwanese girl in an American society. anyway, will reply more later. rushing off to police station now. oh and a rocker who's a preschool teacher? haawwwwt...
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
@Suviko: while you are matching @cybette up with someone, mind finding me someone too? seems that Tampere area is somewhat lacking in the prospective geeky/smart boyfriend thing.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
might as well hook me up to: 21 year old American living in Finland for a little over 14 months.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
lol, now the thead has turned into matching service.
@myrtti how about geeky, smart and sporty? I happen to have a friend in Tampere who is like that.
1 year, 2 months ago by whiteg
@mobiledan and @jkniiv i am not back at kissing girls. lol ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
As in you never stopped ;)
1 year, 2 months ago by mobiledan
LOL...I think someone should create a #matchmaker channel....and charge for entry!
/me off to start the channel....$$$ cha-ching! :P
1 year, 2 months ago by runningwithbulls
@whiteg: M$ enthusiasts need not apply... (yes, I'm picky, but in my previous long time relationship things got worse after the other turned into MS fanboi from Linux geekdom and we had a week long battle over which OS would be best on home multipurpose server, W2003 or Debian...)
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
@myrtti No, he is actually now a Linux applicaion developer, he uses Ubuntu (sadly not Debian). Err this reminds me that I tend to argue with bf which Linux distribution is better for use, Redhat or Debian. (I still insist Freebsd is the best.:P)
1 year, 2 months ago by whiteg
@myrtti: you're based out of Tampere?
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
nevermind, http://myrtti.fi/blog/welcome/about/ you're in tampere. why didn't i meet you before i moved to Helsinki, bollocks.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
@mobiledan a girl doesn't say! :)
1 year, 2 months ago by chibbigirl
@myrtti, I think you should join us in a couple of weeks when I'm in Tampere. From a quick look at your Flickr photos, there may be some conflict - http://tinyurl.com/3zca8u
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
@dsample: bless you :-D you just cheered me up in more ways than you can imagine :-D
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
Sounds like a Tampere meetku on week 40 :-D!
1 year, 2 months ago by map
@map, I hope so :o) I'm there from Sunday to Wednesday now
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
meetku -> matchku!
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
i'll bring the booze and rubbers, who is going to bring the bitchs?
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
/me larts @constantine "I refuse your innuendo and replace it with my own"
"Whisper Python gently to my ear, babeh"
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
@constantine: Promise to keep your pants on this time! At least in bar.
1 year, 2 months ago by map
@myrtti, if I gave you a Ruby would you throw it back? :oP
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
innuendo assumes i'm trying to hide my perverted thoughts and leave it to your imagination to fill the gaps; i like just getting to the point. that's me. stefan.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
@map: when it comes to my pants i don't promise anything.
1 year, 2 months ago by constantine
@dsample: no, I'll slap you with \LaTeXe .
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
all these geek exchange is turning me on :P
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
root@cybette:/# nice -5 'ps -eo comm=turnon'1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
I can haz man ps! WIN.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
U can haz ne man kthxbai :oP
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
fortunately I can write my own documentation and Read The Friendly Man myself ;-P
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
Good lukks be wid ya. Considering current intrpersonal claimat, mefinkz me will not com dis taim to meetku. Tings can chaynj, sou me taiz not me hands 100% in advanss.
1 year, 2 months ago by jkniiv
@suviko: "thanks" for bringing me up as an example.
@myrtti: debian, of course. trivial.
@cybette: hmm... interesting theory, there might be some point there.
1 year, 2 months ago by matnel
This thread is teh WIN. Made me smile in the morning, and laugh out loud in the evening.
1 year, 2 months ago by mandrl
@matnel: I did actually win the first round of that fight. Then he wanted to make a multimedia server out of it, and the tv card had drivers for Windows only. Then I lost.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
Was MythTV not able to cope? I use OSX for my TV. Dunno about using Debian though, I've always been more of a Gentoo person, like the cleanliness of it.
1 year, 2 months ago by dsample
it had some flaky el cheapo fake raid sata card too that had the "correct drivers" for Windows but not for Linux other than SLES and RHEL. I abhore rpm-based Linuxes.
@cybette: what I was akshully thinking was that we definitely need to go out for a cuppa triple espresso and talk! you seem to be an intresting (and also quite similar to myself) person.
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
@myrtti totta kai! let's plan on that. tomorrow i have to help a friend with a programming assignment, not sure how long that'll take, so maybe sometime during the week? one thing though, most of my linux experience have been rpm-based distributions :P heheh..
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette
damn, where has my brain been this week... herm.
@cybette: what kind of plans do you have for the weekend? I'm planning to do my laundry on tomorrow, so perhaps not then, but Sat/Sun?
also, how about that #tampere meetku? time, place?
1 year, 2 months ago by myrtti
@myrtti: on saturday i'll be in Helsinki for the Barcamp and on sunday i think we will have a Tampereen päivä meetku. We're also meeting Duncan on Tuesday evening. haven't confirmed time/place etc. but please feel free to suggest something!
1 year, 2 months ago by cybette